So many thoughts... so many questions... I guess what I've been thinking about lately is the differences between men and women. While there are many similarities I'm beginning to think that the differences are far more vast. Male and female mentality differ in so many ways.. I think that many women do sometimes forget this and I, myself, often forget too. Women are perhaps a bit more complex and delve in their thoughts...relishing what each action is supposed to mean and fantasize about the future often. Men, I believe sometimes do the same, but often times take things as they are without pondering on petty things. We have heard of the horror stories about the crazy girlfriends... and I think this is just due to lack of communication and trust. Women often times jump to conclusions or create perfect situations in their minds, without properly conveying to their man what they really want or need out of their respective situations. I am not putting all the blame on girls by no means, because men are often to blame as well, they can play dumb or just create horrible situations for themselves. Needless to say, there is no perfect in relationships. You must take the good and bad and somehow make it work...that is if that person is worth it :P

I think that is important to realize and acknowledge these differences.  Be who you are and love what you do.

With the rain comes deep thought. Deep thought and odd moods. Moods that harvest mixed emotions and brain scramble.

I'm always a thinker...and sometimes it is to my benefit, but often times I find myself wasting precious time overanalyzing unimportant situations. Why can't I just take things for as they are and move on? I hate how I question most things and contemplate why certain people act as they do. Is this just women in general? Why do guys always seem to not ever give a shit? Or maybe guys are just better at hiding it... Either way, I've realized that I can't get caught up in trivial situations and let it affect me too much. I'm too easily affected at times, and need to be stronger and more worry-free. All I need are my friends and family. With these nothing can go wrong.

I often find myself questioning who I am and if I'm good enough. Should I have done this? Or not done that? You know what fuck it. I hope you think I'm crazy :) I am who I am and I don't regret any decisions I have made in the past. I've made plenty of mistakes, but I have learned so many valuable lessons in my twenty one years of life. Life is dynamic and I only wish to keep learning and building character and relationships with every breath. I will not live in fear nor regret.

Today I take life by its reins and embark full force.

Guess it's been awhile since I've written in here.

It's funny how deceiving things can be. Or maybe i'm too blind to see the truth when its so clearly in front of me. Why can't I foresee the bad that comes my way. I have decided you can never trust anyone too soon. I have made that mistake far too many times... and this time is the final straw. The same thing over and over again. I hate making up excuses for people and I will not anymore. Is it so hard to find someone decent? I don't even care if I'm overreacting anymore. I can't even organize my thoughts... I'm done. No more letting people in ... no more thinking there is a chance. There is no one for me right now.